A False Narrative Corrected, A Birthday Celebrated!

(From 7.15.18)

Tears of Joy…and…Gratitude:

My dad would have been 84 years old today!

…Been thinkin’ about him all day. Forever grateful for a beautiful “Cinderella” type ending that happened for us before he unexpectedly died of a heart attack almost a week to the day after our last call (2011). That said, I didn’t know my dad all that well as we had a strained relationship throughout most of my life. In my late 20s we engaged in counseling for a short bit, and in my 30s I committed to doing the forgiveness work -of myself and him…

For my 35th birthday I believe it was, I asked him to forgo a present, but instead I asked him to write me a letter.

“Dad, will you write me a letter so that I know who you see me as? Tell me what I was like as a little girl. What could you tell me about my early years? What was my personality like?”

Folks, this was one of the most profound gifts in my entire life.

IF a girl or grown woman has a father’s wound it very often consumes her and impacts all of her relationships – for sure personally and romantically- and to some degree even professionally. IF she has a father’s wound (her inner little girl) so desperately wants to know the truth behind the defensive, veiled feelings -as if there was no guilt, blame, or shame.

For a father to tell her daughter the good he sees in her, that he loves her – and/or tells her who she was as a little girl is so healing.

One of the things my dad wrote, “Even at young age I always saw you as a wonder child.”

(I actually had to ask him to tell me what that meant…)

As my parents divorced when I was 6 YO and the nature of my relationship with my dad worsened with abandonment issues over the years…and my limiting beliefs included that I was unlovable and just not enough…this was HUGE for me to read.

My dad passed away 7 years later – and for about 1.5 years before he died we were estranged. It was a #divinenudge that had me call my Dad the week before he was (unknowingly) going to pass away.

“I love you” was exchanged.
He had asked me to come and visit in Arizona, and there was such a freedom upon getting off that call. So much freedom that I called Kelly (my now husband) in Thailand to tell him how “light and easy” the call was.

Now, 12 years later I have much to be grateful for. Having that letter is one such thing. I can read it whenever I’m curious about something or am really missing my dad…

One thing for sure is – it is a SOLID TOOL to use if I slip back into a “false narrative”. I can read it and know what is #Truth.

I love you Dad.
That letter has healed wounded parts of my heart more than you could have ever imagined and helps me to coach others in some profound ways. Our story ended with forgiveness, freedom, a “knowingness”, love, and pearls of wisdom so that others can glean hope for their own healing if they want. …There is no shame in our story.

Thank you for picking up the phone and thank you for seeing me when my cloudy vision did not have me seeing myself…

Happy birthday, Kim XOXO

PS: You would love Doctor Prescott! I see your smile and hear you saying, “He’s a really neat dog. He’s pretty cool.” …And you’re right! A big fluffy teddy bear I get to have now…thx to Kel!

***Champions, do you have a father wound? May this message on forgiveness encourage you:
https://tinyurl.com/y773ymsf

#ModernDayMiracle
#ForgiveToBeFree
#CinderellaEnding
#LuckiestLittleGirl
#NoShortCutsNoRegrets
#LivingYourTruthCoaching